Show me how pretty the world is.

I didn’t sleep much last night. I’m only now remembering this. It’s kinda funny to think about actually. This morning seems so long ago.

This morning my daughter played with the babe for a bit before school. My stomach and abdomen and old scars from past surgeries have been hurting so much recently. I layed flat on the bed and realized it’s been months since I’ve been flat like that. I’m always standing or sitting, or at night as I sleep, I’m on my right side. My muscles and organs and everything must be so jacked up. So I’m going to try to take time each day to lay on my back for a bit. And rub on my muscles and break up some scar tissue. Also, I think I might have diastasis, but that’s probably for another entry sometime.

Today wasn’t eating all day. That’s ultimately where I want to get. Good breaks between meals. Oh. And more water.

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1732 calories 22 fiber

My fat is still much higher than my protein (yay!) but I doubt it really needs to be as high as it is. And I started off today with this English muffin French today concoction thing and didn’t even finish it. It was just too much.

Tomorrow I need to buy more bacon. And clean my kitchen. Goodnight loveys.

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A sorta fairytale with you.

When I created this blog, I wanted it to be a neutral place I could come to talk about whatever. I feel like so far I only talk about keto. All things considered that’s not really a bad thing. It feels nice that I haven’t had to talk things out too much. Soon though. I have a list of things I need to get on and anxiety pauses me too often. For now, sleep. It’s late.

I made fathead pizza today! With pesto. It was so good. The crust was still just a tad bit more cheese than bread, but it is a nice substitute. I’m interested in seeing the other ways I can use the bread. Also I made a new fat bomb today. Something I’ve never seen anywhere. Recipe tomorrow!

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1679 calories 20 fiber 4 sugar alcohols

I feel good about my calories and my macros and my water intake (90-100oz a day, on average). Weigh in is tomorrow. Numbers are always interesting. I just wish I’d feel better soon. And that my ribs didn’t constantly feel like they are pulling apart. Okay-real sleep now.

Next set of tens.

Today was really great. I think my favorite part is that my husband has started keto too. This is something that I never expected to witness. I’m still trying to not get too excited, but holy fuck it makes me so happy. Not for the company, although I love it. But for the chance for him to see what his body is truly capable of eating so clean. For the inflammation and the pain to decrease (or subside entirely). For the risk of autoimmune diseases to not weigh so heavy on him. For energy in abundance and lifted fog and clarity. For no more fear of diabetes. For confidence and general feelings of goodness. Oh my god. I’m so excited for him. And I’m excited too because I don’t think he eats enough and proper nourishment will be amazing for him.

So yay!

For me, I’m excited for a weekend. There’s great weather and I’ve been cleaning the basement and productivity feels amazing.

I feel good about today’s choices. No chocolate. No baked goods. Eating when hungry. A couple times I was really hungry by the time I ate. That felt good. It felt even better that when I was hungry I didn’t snack. I patiently made a meal and didn’t stuff my face with food while I made food. It didn’t even cross my mind to. I only just now thought about how differently I used to eat.

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1327 calories 10 fiber

My macros were pretty today.

I was thinking earlier about all the things I miss about weighing less, being more fit, and eating clean for an extended period of time.

I miss squishy tummy skin and slender fingers. I miss bony wrists and veiny feet. I miss my clavicle.

More than those things I miss pain free days. I look forward to pain free days.

The day the earth stood still.

I slept not much last night. My daughter hogged the bed. Still tho, it was a really decent day.

I love my husband a lot. He saved my sanity when I got all nauseous and lightheaded. Hours later and I’m finally starting to feel functioning again. I even ate dinner.

Alright. Macros, then sleep.

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1384 calories 7 fiber

Days with chicken always have too much protein. Chicken is so delicious though. I didn’t care about fat today. I just wanted to keep down food.

Simon says: Day 2

I’ve been up since 6:20am. Baby ate and then played in his bouncer. I got to snuggle in bed with Thing Two for a good long while. This warms my heart and today it’s the thought that fills my mind instead of entertaining the idea of snacking. Cause I’m underslept and exhausted and cranky, and snacking is the go to. But these 30 days are about building a healthier lifestyle and making good decisions for myself. This isn’t immediate gratification. This is big picture.

I wasn’t hungry enough to eat a whole meal when I first woke up, nor did I want to eat if it wasn’t a whole meal. I finally ate around 8:30. No electronics. But a fussy baby on my lap. I left one burger, but by the end of the meal, I was getting full and finished the potato anyway. My brain kinda went into panic mode and Baby Thing was screaming and, man, I can really see why no distractions is important for mindfulness.

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Now it’s 11am and I’m hoping the babe will sleep so I can pass out.

3pm
Babe didn’t want to sleep at 11:30, so I made food for myself and figured we’d go out after I ate.

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I couldn’t take all the exhaustion though and I chose to listen to netflix while I ate. After I ate, I made one last ditch effort for the baby to sleep. Hurray!! That finally did the trick! He finally passed out and we slept from 11:45ish til 2:45!!! What a relief!

Then I ate at 3:45.

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Around 6:30 the Cat in the Hat and I were going to go out. I made a small snack because I knew we’d be going out for a good few hours.

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I had almond butter on the apple slices.

We got back and I made dinner and finally ate again at 9:45. It’s our tradition to watch The West Wing and eat dinner and ice cream. I stayed mindful while eating and nixed the ice cream.

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I had a few moments today when I got a little antsy with food or wanted to snack or just was anxious in general and would have normally used food to quell that. I did what I had to do anyway though to be succussful. Bring on tomorrow!

Simon says: Follow the rules.

The Whole30 program has 8 steps (unless you’ve done this before and then there are only five). I’m going to follow the 8 steps because I’d rather go back to basic basics, in order to be successful. Step Two is Read the Program. It outlines the program rules and what is expected of me. The rules have to be followed exactly to optimize results. Bitching about the rules is pointless. It’s only 30 days. I chose this.

The rules are as follows, for 30 days:

Eat Real Food
This includes meat, eggs, seafood, lots of vegetables, little fruit and good fats from oils, nuts and seeds.

Avoid Not Real Food
No sugar, alcohol, grains, legumes, dairy, carrageenan, MSG, and sulfites. No unpronounceable ingredients. No paleofied baked goods.

No scale. No measurements.

Extras to Remember
Clarified butter or ghee are okay.Fruit juice as a sweetener is okay.
Green beans, sugar snap peas and snow pea pods are acceptable.
White, balsamic, red wine, apple cider and rice vinegars are allowed.
Salt is okay.

Commitment
As part of the rules, I must commit to these guidelines for 30 days. No slips, no excuses, no whining. 100% commitment for 30 days.

This is Step Two—the information. This is the easy part. I’ll delve into some of the other steps tomorrow.

 

 

*All of this information can be found on the official Whole30 site or pdf.

Simon says: Be accountable.

I am going to complete a Whole30 in September. I used to eat this way as a constant lifestyle. For five years. Then last year I got pregnant and eventually all that remained was gluten free. Now I’m trying to manage raising a new baby (along with two older children) and sleep-deprivation and stress. I miss feeling healthy. I don’t want to feel like I’m losing my mind anymore. Anyone up for a game of Simon Says? I need all the help I can get.